[Grovenet] Summary of Life

[Alan Domenghini aka an OleHoss]

Got this from a cousion who lives down in Sico... 

Summary of Life 
GREAT  TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:
1)  Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a  tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families  are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few  nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just  yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5)  Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on  the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose  your cereal for the fiber, not the
 toy. 
GREAT  TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD
1)  Growing old is mandatory; growing up is  optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need  all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you  fall down, you wonder what else you can do while
 you're down there.
4) You're getting old when  you get the same sensation from a rocking
chair  that you once got from a roller coaster.
5)  It's frustrating when you know all the answers  but nobody
bothers to ask you the  questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but  it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with  age, but sometimes age comes alone.
GREAT  TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE  LEARNED:
1)  No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize  cats.
2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad,  don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your  sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always  catch
the second person.
4) Never ask your  3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You  can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't  sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7)  Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same  time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli  in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polk a-dot  underwear under white shorts.
10) The best  place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's  lap.
THE  FOUR STAGES OF  LIFE:
1)  You believe in Santa  Claus.
2) You don't  believe in Santa  Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4)  You look like Santa  Claus.
SUCCESS the True Definition:
At  age 4 success is . . . . Not piddling in your  pants.
At age 12 success is . . . Having  friends.
At age 17 success is . .    Having a driver's license.
At age 35 success  is . . . Having money.
At age 50 success is .  . . Having money.
At age 70 success is . . .  Having a drivers license.
At age 75 success  is . . .. Having friends.
At age 80 success  is . . . Not piddling in your  pants.
Always remember to  forget the troubles that pass your  way; BUT
NEVERforget the blessings  that come each day.
Have  a wonderful day with many ! *smiles*

Take  the time to live!!!
Life is too  short.
Dance naked. Woo-hoo!